My friend forgot her fork today

DudeNeptune (EST)
My friend forgot her fork today

[Source]

kevinsyel 447 571 124

Is she single? This kind of ingenuity is... sexy to me

NakedAndTheDead 553 648 95

"Damn bitch, you resourceful."

ImTheHeroRedditNeeds 97 138 41

"yeah... you like that? you fucking retar-smart bitch?"

PrimmSlimShady 6 19 13

That comment in askreddit was one of the funniest things I have ever read hahaha

MakeFake 4 7 3

It came from elsewhere.

ELEMENTALITYNES 8 10 2

I sure did

mlmmlm -1 2 3

This man needs more upvotes for this reference.

spyd3rweb 18 19 1

ey bby, u want sum fork?

kevinsyel 1 1 0

Ber-Zer-Ker!

Saricc 29 30 1

Could a rowboat support her?

MessOfMamasBBQ 7 7 0

Well....no.

kmar1292 2 2 0

DAMNIT PHYLLIS I KNEW IT

DudeNeptune 66 83 17

yeah but she has thing for spoons

Fuzzyphilosopher 19 32 13

I can spoon.

It's OK to give her my number because I want her on my side when civilization collapses.

Zanaffer 10 11 1

Not so sure...

Try to spoon, then suddenly get spork. Sounds painful.

CaliburS 3 3 0

Somewhere someone is out there for the other side of every fetish

Fuzzyphilosopher 1 2 1

lol

ghostrider4450 2 2 0

Ask her if she likes to be big spoon or little spoon. Her ingenuity should result in sex either way.

royalspork 1 1 0

How about sporks?

claysallday 4 4 0

I wouldn't classify mrs mcguyver as single

ALLOWEDTOTYPEINCAPS 3 3 0

Now everytime you see a damn fork...are you george costanza?

Jojuko 3 3 0

I am so relieved I am not the only one.

dreckmal 1 1 0

I think any man would be proud of this. Improvisation, Ingenuity, Resourcefulness... That one devise speaks volumes.

AsskickMcGee 2 2 0

Is she Vega?

duckmurderer 0 2 2

It's fucking plants. Just use your hands and wash them when you're done. Fucking Christ.

fuzzby 131 155 24

Two knives makes a pair of chopsticks. When you master chopsticks, you can make them out of anything.

smilespray 45 58 13

Upvoting because I suck at chopsticks and you sound like a chopstick ninja.

fuzzby 27 37 10

Once you master it it's almost impossible to forget it. It is one of the handier lifehack stills to have! You can probably ask your asian friends for help. With chopsticks you can grab, poke, stir, shovel (almost a spoon), and you can cut foods that aren't too hard with the scissor technique.

There's also a lot of history, customs, etiquette and superstition with chopsticks. Some cultures never leave chopsticks upright in a rice bowl because it symbolizes death. Some cultures frown upon the scissor cutting technique and prefer the single hand cutting technique.

You can get travel chopsticks that collapse into a tiny carrier. Some of them even have clips for your keyring or your bag.

You can wash 10 pairs of chopsticks at the same time in a fraction of the time it takes to wash 10 sets of cutlery!

Chopsticks are great!

titty_factory 22 23 1
hungryhippo13 5 5 0

Totally thought that was serious, until the face he made.

Turakamu 3 3 0

There are a few of them out there. You might enjoy their guide to eating sushi.

monkyyy 2 2 0

"allowing the japanese to enjoy a large variety of protected animals"

Nottan_Asian 2 2 0

I've heard some cultures frown pretty badly upon having your chopsticks across your bowl, especially when pointing at someone. I can't remember why, though.

goatcoat 1 1 0

Collapsible chopsticks? Like tent poles?

fuzzby 2 2 0
im_gonna_afk 2 2 0

That seems like something the TSA would confiscate as weaponry though

fuzzby 2 2 0
friday6700 2 2 0

I can eat with my hands and wash them in a fraction of the time it takes to wash ten pairs of chopsticks.

jackyface 1 1 0

I own some that look like lightsabers.

doctor_dreddit 3 3 0
Turakamu 1 1 0

I'll come pay your bill, buddy

eekozoid 7 7 0

Setting up an event for the electric car club back in junior high school. One of the parents brings us chinese take out. No utensils anywhere, because we're in a workshop and all of the other buildings are locked. Shop teacher pulls out a sheet of wood, starts up the table saw, and makes a few sets of square rods. The rest of us get to work with sandpaper, and after a few minutes, we have a full set of chopsticks. Then food was had.

mekily 1 1 0

That's awesome.

Fuzzyphilosopher 4 4 0

And chopsticks can function as hair accessories. This vid http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D0GVhFz0GqI Only uses one, but I've seen it done with two, you know just in case....

fuzzby 5 6 1

I think it looks super classy =)

http://imgur.com/HHrYHzS

ElToroFuerte 2 2 0
JlyGrnGiant 2 2 0

I've used 2 pens before...

KingotWinterCarnival 1 1 0

Done this. It was very convenient to be able to cut and grab my food with the same utensils.

Menzei 29 34 5

Nice knork you got there

ofirissmart 14 20 6

Holds up knork

Mallack 9 12 3

GOD NO

Terminus14 3 5 2

That's so random!

Richtofen-MD 152 182 30

"Finally Macgyver-ed a fork so now I...fuck, my break's over..."

TheAngryAgnostic 18 21 3

Haha my first thought exactly. I barely have enough time to fill my face as it is.

wanderlust_25 120 154 34

...or she could just use her fingers....

shahadien 43 97 54

or just used a single toothpick....ya know....the way they're designed to be used...

spazmodic- 136 160 24

so the thing designed to be used for impaling and eating food was named "toothpick"?

goatcoat 55 66 11

Yes. It's a substitute tooth, and you use it like a pickaxe to strike the food before bringing it to your mouth. You can also use it to mine stone very slowly.

friday6700 11 16 5

That doesn't sound right but I don't know enough about toothpicks to dispute it.

jordan042 1 1 0

Thanks Charlie.

NotAPigsBirthday 3 3 0

I know it is terribly uncivilized but that is what I would have done. Nothing in there that can't be eaten with your fingers if you have nothing else! Although the fork is cute.

wanderlust_25 2 2 0

That's exactly what I thought. I totally scoped out the container and saw nothing objectionable.

rob-cubed 37 47 10

I see she's played forkey-knifey before.

shimmehkins 10 10 0

where'd she get the knife

FlyingOctopussy 47 51 4

In the drawer next to the forks.

d0rknut 16 17 1

If rubber bands weren't so nasty this would be genius! Pretty impressive though. I'd just use the toothpick, giving my friends no chance of taking a pic and making the front page.

cheapdad 6 6 0

Yes, yuck. Few things in your home are as filthy as rubber bands.

The_Whole_World 1 1 0

Like doorknobs?

bs000 1 1 0

I hate when people use rubber bands for stuff like open bags of chips. After you take off the rubber band and eat the chips you can still taste the rubber band just from it touching your fingers.

EvenShadows 8 8 0

Her office doesn't have plastic utensils..?

klausterfok 6 6 0

I worked in a place that didn't have utensils/napkins/plates/cups because money....pretty fucking stupid but it does happen.

StrahansToothGap 4 4 0

I work in an office that is 'green', so there are no plastic utensils. We have regular silverware, but people hoard that shit at their desks so during lunch time, there's never any forks. I always bring my own fork.

Edit: meant forks, not knives

nightshift82 4 5 1

perhaps she works in a city of Philadelphia run lab that doesn't have the resources to supply its chemists with cutlery...

_liminal 2 2 0

can just go to any coffee shop or McD down the street and take a plastic fork

AGuyOnTheInternets 1 1 0

My employer offers them, but they are flimsy as hell and not worth picking up. Went down to Walmart and got me a real fork for like $1.

nano535 7 7 0

Green beans and broccoli? Psh, finger food

jermzdeejd 5 5 0

I would have just used my fingers......just sayin.

Moojack 6 7 1

God forbid you eat something like veggies with your fingers. The horrors of veggie island!

Canuckarican 10 13 3

Its the Wolverine of utensils

reacher 1 1 0

I should have put my SNAKT!! comment here originally...

Thoreauly 3 3 0

Trust me, I'm engineering student.

AGuyOnTheInternets 2 2 0

Has this design been through formal qualification yet?

CaptainObliviousIII 3 3 0

Rubberband vinaigrette sounds... tasty.

i_hate_carrots 3 3 0

She needs this

thehollownike 5 6 1

"Necessity is the mother of invention."

Hazywater 22 36 14

She forgot her food too. THAT is what food eats

CarlaWasThePromQueen 10 16 6

She also forget her protein.

FunkEnet 7 9 2

I got a order from Noodles Co today and I ordered a dish without meat cause I am cheap and wanted a big ass bowl of noodly shit. I guess the guy knew me because when I opened it up, guess what, there was motherfucking chicken in there. AH YEAH!!

LearningMan 5 7 2

That. Won't even work.

We_Are_Vigilant 1 1 0

Can't believe it took me this long to find someone saying this. She'd be lucky if she got one bites worth out of it.

raspberrysundae 2 2 0

I've pretty much stopped bringing broccoli / cauliflower / brussels sprouts in my lunch because I'm paranoid that it stinks up the microwave. Socially awkward penguin is very self-conscious.

megaclown 2 2 0

Those are some fucking high society toothpicks.

Skinzard 2 2 0

Omg no way could I just pick the vegetables up with my fingers and eat them that way... This is ridiculous. get over it people!

FenrirIII 2 2 0

Snikt!

drunkenkyle 2 2 0

She also forgot meat.

ChronicChad 2 2 0

Am I the only one that noticed how fancy the toothpicks are? Like damn.

ProbablyProne 2 2 0

Now if she had fashioned chopsticks I'd be more impressed.

CoffeePuma 2 2 0

chop sticks would have been easier.

b0red_dud3 3 3 0

But she didn;t forget her rubber band and 4 toothpicks?

VaultBoy9 2 2 0

Those are the fanciest toothpicks I've ever seen.

darkneo86 2 2 0

What place has a plastic knife and toothpicks available, but no plastic fork?

ikwj 2 2 0

She has access to wooden skewers and a plastic knife, but no fork?

Salty_Minnesota 2 2 0

Takes too long, I'd just shovel it into my mouth.

Ishouldbedoingmyhmk 2 2 0

The creator gave us hands for a reason maynee

gaahl666 2 2 0

Is she an engineer? If not, she should reconsider career paths.

DudeNeptune 2 2 0

no, but she does work for an aerospace engineer company

Dezipter 2 2 0

Guess your friend saw this

geekbruin 2 2 0

You should submit this to the sad desk lunch tumblr

cpaladino4 2 2 0

But she had toothpicks and rubberbands?

ParadigmSchism 2 2 0

Wanna know how I got these scars...?

emerica2214 2 2 0

This food taste like rubber.

Dylanopsis 2 2 0

And we have another life hack moron... Use your fingers dumbass.

Krafty_Koala 2 2 0

I forgot one at work a week ago and the only things available were some tiny coffee straws. I texted my husband for ideas and he told me to use my credit card as a food shovel. Thankfully a coworker gave me a fork.

redmello 2 2 0

I love the sound of that- just the phrase gets me laughing. "Use your credit card as a food shovel."

InThatIsuzuHombre 2 2 0

She must be an engineer

SirAvoMcado 2 2 0

But those are clearly finger foods

spundred 6 10 4

There's been a mistake. You've accidentally given me the food that my food eats.

mrespman 4 6 2

Or, here's an idea: FINGERS. YOU CAN USE YOUR FINGERS, YOU NEANDERTHAL.

copy-of-a-copy 1 1 0

Ironically, I think a Neanderthal would use thier fingers for food instead of an unwieldy tool. How homo sapien of her.

kazanshin 3 4 1

GERMS!

Microthrowaway64 3 4 1

If only I had something to eat this food with... Maybe something on the end of my wrists with long, moving and bending joints capable of picking up this food... Uh well, I'll just fashion a fork out of toothpicks and rubber bands instead.

Dreamtrain 3 5 2

Just eat with your hands, it's not fucking soup.

RonnyDarKo 1 3 2

Nice

EnamoredToMeetYou 2 3 1

So while I appreciate the ingenuity... She was eating broccoli. Why not just use the toothpicks hor dourves style?

evilted 5 8 3

Or put the bowl on the floor and eat it like a dog?

RecklessTaco 2 3 1

the struggle is all too real.

cautiousghost 2 3 1
wyleFTW 2 3 1
BarelyLethal 2 2 0

I really enjoyed that. Thank you.

wyleFTW 0 1 1

You're welcome!

DookieAndPoot 1 1 0

Why the hell do plastic knives sometimes have that perpendicular edge to them? Have you ever tried cutting something in half with those knives? It doesn't work!!

BLAAAAAAAARRRRG!!!!!

MacScotty 1 1 0

Genius!!!!!!!!!!

TheJonBomb 1 1 0

Haha my coworker forgot his fork and took 2 plastic knives and used them as chop sticks. He probably did that because I was using chopsticks

LordxBeezus 1 1 0

http://i.imgur.com/EUxcDKI.jpg

No? I couldnt help but see.

KingOfFrownz 1 1 0

If it looks stupid, but it works, then it's not stupid

Solkre 1 1 0

If she was in hunger games, I'd want her on my side.

ADUADU 1 1 0
GoodlooksMcGee 1 1 0

must be an engineer

eyes_cube 1 1 0

some survivorman shit

comtrailer 1 1 0

I'd just use my hands, but I am an animal.

Autolycan 1 1 0

This is cute! I love the ingenuity.

Res_Gestae 1 1 0

Fingers work even better.

takemetoyour_ 1 1 0

Cool but 100% chance this worked like shit and would have been easier to eat with her hands.

nzveritas 1 1 0

The Knork was actually invented by Mahatma Ghandi www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTygajaWaR0

HalcyonHeroine 1 1 0

I see two sets of chopsticks attached to that knife.

kbobdc3 1 1 0

GHITEAU!

trinitysun 1 1 0
Pickle_Pants5 1 1 0

The struggle is real.

The_Roz 1 1 0

Chipotle called, they want their toothpicks back.

therealandrewpuetz 1 1 0

Forgot a fork, yet brought 4 toothpicks and rubberbands. Seems legitimate.

NotJimNabors 1 1 0

Should have bought a salad glove.

xTye 1 1 0

Too lazy to find a fork...

jess_in_chains 1 1 0

She should probably learn to use chopsticks. Eating with chopsticks is what I do for fun.

MatthewG141 1 1 0
mattkenefick 1 1 0

I have a feeling this probably didn't work out

Keerikkadan91 1 1 0

Or.. Or.. Fingers.

asimplescribe 1 1 0

It doesn't look very sloppy so you could just eat it like a dog would.

nonameowns 1 1 0

too embarrassing to use your fingers?

toumei64 1 1 0

Someone is salaried.

hgorn 1 1 0

I feel like it would have been easier just to run to a store...

CANTgetAbuttPREGNANT 1 1 0

Christ thats a lot of work when you can just use the old two knife chopstix!

Deltabeat 1 1 0

Is your friend Macgyver's daughter?

iLLeT 1 1 0

I would just hold 3 toothpicks at different angles and chomp away.

EatPussyWithAFork 1 1 0

Lovely.

7ate9 1 1 0

You're friends with Ms. McGyver?

bertlayton 1 1 0

I feel like that wouldn't work... Wouldn't the toothpicks just be pushed back?

jojo_kisses 1 1 0

And left looking like the joker...

redmello 1 1 0

But lucky for her, she rigged a nice Krueger claw to stab those green beans with.

boom2112 1 1 0

McGuyver like a muthafucka.

stylinghead 1 1 0

Those are teatree oil toothpicks. Bet it tasted kind of nasty.

Brokencloudcreations 1 1 0

How about try eating with your man-forks. (Fingers)

MeowschwitzInHere 1 1 0

This looks like it would turn itself into a bomb as soon as you push against something solid.. Rubber band pushes to the edge of the toothpicks, toothpicks take out the entire room.

aztke 1 1 0

pencil chopsticks got me through college

yourenotserious 1 1 0

A new rubber band has would have powder/oil all over it and an old one would be nasty.

OriDoodle 1 1 0

....She could eat most of that with her fingers.

Scott-B 1 1 0

Because her hands are filthy?

BabyRuler 1 1 0

Did your friend McGyver learn that from the boys scout?

vmcla 1 1 0

She should have gone out for tacos

AcceptablePariahdom 1 2 1

It would have taken her less time to use a toothpick to grab individual pieces of food and eat them than it did for her to craft that.

wookiesandwich 1 2 1

/r/funny? really? anyone?

want-cake 1 2 1

let me guess - your friend is an engineer?

m4gicm4n 1 2 1

I too was without a fork about a month ago but this was all I could come up with http://imgur.com/hWb5hyQ

_simba_ -1 6 7

If it looks stupid but it works then it's not stupid

Mattprime86 1 3 2

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAGAGHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

AGuyOnTheInternets 2 3 1
blore40 1 2 1

I have stuck wooden coffee stirrer strips into the office pencil sharpener to make a one tine fork.

shahadien 1 1 0

One tine fork = Skewer.

Rikhart 0 1 1

Is anything wrong with his/her hands? You know you can eat with your hands, right?

ajaxwhat 0 1 1

Leftover broccoli STINKS! I feel bad for your break room.

subieguy23 0 1 1

hands are just as useful.

jcaseys34 1 2 1

She had her knife, but forgot her fork? Or they had plastic forks but not knives? I call bullshit, see you in /r/karmacourt.

nhlacey9879 0 1 1

If just use my finger lol

via: reddit.com/r/funny/comments/25kf3a/my_friend_forgot_her_fork_today/